Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
love makes seman taste better
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
I just want nice things and good sex
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
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