It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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