If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
