put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Such a big mess for such a small penis
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize