who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Sry I called you an 8
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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