Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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