well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
They are going to name an STD after you.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
Randomize
