After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Randomize