All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
