so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Randomize
