Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Everyone says I win the strip club
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
