ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Randomize
