Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
Randomize
