do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
Randomize
