I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
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