Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
You can't just leave with hair like that
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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