Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Drake has all the answers
Never let your siblings swipe right.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize