i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Its about making memories worth repressing
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
You took a bar mat shot.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
Randomize
