This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
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