no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
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