We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
