I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Randomize
