I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Do you still have your period?
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize