Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize