My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Randomize
