she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
