it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Randomize
