What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
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