So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
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