Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Randomize
