Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Randomize
