Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
