No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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