Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
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