Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Floor bacon is actually really good
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
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