he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Sext me about skeletons
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Randomize
