How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
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