dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Randomize
