so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
