I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
my poor anus
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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