Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
