lets start a swedish sibling band together
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize
