my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
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