I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize
