Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
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