I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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