Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
