I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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