I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
