Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
its not stalking. its research.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Randomize
