That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
you made out with another girl for some wings
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Randomize
